{"id":5596,"date":"2012-07-26T13:06:23","date_gmt":"2012-07-26T13:06:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/tumblwise.cynwise.com\/?p=5596"},"modified":"2012-07-26T13:06:23","modified_gmt":"2012-07-26T13:06:23","slug":"when-i-first-get-to-wallet-i-am-new-guy-but","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/tumblwise.cynwise.com\/?p=5596","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"<blockquote><p>When I first get to wallet, I am \u201cnew guy.\u201d But time passes. I stay for so long, I become veteran. When I first arrive, Jamba Juice has just two stamps. Next thing I know, he has five stamps\u2014then six, then seven. When he gets ten stamps, he is gone. One day, Learner Permit disappears. In his place, there is new guy, Driver License. I become worried. Things are changing very fast.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<div class='attribution'>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.newyorker.com\/humor\/2012\/07\/30\/120730sh_shouts_rich?currentPage=all\">Simon Rich: \u201cUnprotected\u201d&#160;: The New Yorker<\/a><\/p>\n<p>A strangely endearing tale of the life of &#8230; a condom.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When I first get to wallet, I am \u201cnew guy.\u201d But time passes. I stay for so long, I become veteran. When I first arrive, Jamba Juice has just two stamps. Next thing I know, he has five stamps\u2014then six, then seven. When he gets ten stamps, he is gone. One day, Learner Permit disappears. <a class=\"read-more\" href=\"http:\/\/tumblwise.cynwise.com\/?p=5596\">[&hellip;]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"quote","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5596","post","type-post","status-publish","format-quote","hentry","category-uncategorized","post_format-post-format-quote"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/tumblwise.cynwise.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5596","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/tumblwise.cynwise.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/tumblwise.cynwise.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/tumblwise.cynwise.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/tumblwise.cynwise.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5596"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/tumblwise.cynwise.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5596\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/tumblwise.cynwise.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5596"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/tumblwise.cynwise.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5596"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/tumblwise.cynwise.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5596"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}